Thanksgiving Break, Yo!

I have always heard that Sophomore Year is the hardest year in high school.

I sincerely hope that those people are right...10th grade is killing me! I am beginning to think my teachers want me to die. Die, I tell you. Especially Spanish. And Honors Geometry. And English, even. And oh, Biology. World History is easy as crap, but just plain dull. And Advanced Drama? Haha, don't even get me started on how much I hate that class.

So, yeah. I'm so glad we have a break this week, or I may have ended it all. Haha. No, seriously. It's bad, guys.

Oh, and update on my mood? Better. I definitely still have my down moods, but it's not an all the time deal. It's definitely an improvement.

Oh! I saw New Moon at midnight with a bunch of people for Leah's birthday. SO amazing, and I'm not just saying that because I am a teenage girl, and therefore obliged to. It really is an awesome movie, it beats Twilight by far.

My plans for this week include: Spending individual time with Heather, Amber, and Courtney. *Hopefully also Sarah!* Thanksgiving at the West's in Acworth...then that night with the Traylor's in LG.

Superrr fun ahead guys. That's it! :D

Jordan

Typical?

I have always prided myself in being "anything but your typical teenager".
This, however, does not mean that I don't have my moments where I am whiny and whatnot.
Shallow, no.
Hormonal, yes.

For some reason, I have been suffering from unexplainable and abnormal sadness.
I refuse to call this depression because that is WAY too typical, and I will not claim the "depressed teenager" label. No sir. Take it back! Anyways, I don't know why. But I am sad and I don't like it.

Just thought I'd let you know.

Jordan

October Weekends...and a few jewels! :)

I officially hate leaves. I hate them with a deep, fiery passion. My biology teacher may possibly be Satan. Um, so, yeah, and classifying them is even worse. 10th grade biology is destroying my weekend, haha.

Favorite quote so far today?

"I am never getting excited and saying LEAF! again. If I say that, it is because I saw a leaf and now I am terrified." -Cwizz :))

Diamonds- Thursday, October 15- Me and Ronni's "map" in Mrs. Gardner's class of our bubble and Zac Efron's house!

Assorted days: -Monroe's quote about fairy tales- "Sex is a fact of life. If a guy asks for it, he's a player. If a girl gives it, she's a whore. If two people wait, it's a fairy tale."
-Being told that I stand out above all the rest :)
-Explosions in math class.
-Bonding before the volleyball game; Hailey being absolutely crazedd!
-Andrew deciding to kill everyone not in the bubble; Sarah thinking he meant the literal bubble and putting her little sister Sammy in the bubble as fast as she could.
-Sarah's "Venezuela!" "or...Eureka!"

Yupp. I love my lifee.

Jordan

Tribulation Trails

It. Is. Cold.
Might I add, HELLO GEORGIA, IT WAS JUST SUMMER!
Thank you.
Haha, okay. So since I will be going to West VA to ski over the February break with Crossray Baptist, where Blake and I go to youth, I have to participate in fundraisers to help raise money.
Fundraisers...I don't know why they put "Fun" in there. Harassing people in an non-obnoxious way to give you money for a trip is not my cup of tea. Let me fill you in on exactly what we are doing.
Tribulation Trails is a walk through the book of Revelation in the Bible. Mt. Vernon Church puts it on every year during October. This is my third year experiencing it. The trail is pretty cool, but I have heard that it used to be amazing. Like, life-altering. Now, it's just cool...I personally feel like if the scenes were a bit more developed and intense, and if the actors had a great objective in mind, the trail could change many lives. However, that's just my opinion; I know it has saved many people and I am sure it will continue to bring many more to Jesus.

For us to raise money, we have to sell glow in the dark "GodStrong" bracelets at the Trib Trails entrance. It is fun. Well, it can be. It's just so cold! And rejection, it hurts. Haha. So what am I trying to get across here? Come to Trib Trails, buy a bracelet from me, and maybe, just maybe, be amazed by Jesus!

Jordan :D

Diamonds in the Rough...

I would first like to openly admit to epically failing at titling blogs.
Simply put, I don't have the gift of giving things titles. Sorry...but anyways, I called this blog "Diamonds in the Rough" for a reason. You know how every once in awhile there will be something sweet/funny/memorable that happens and you think and/or verbalize that "That just made my day." Yupp, those are diamonds. Life is rough. Actually, my life's not. Don't get me wrong, it's no picnic. It could, however, be a lot rougher. But in comparison to the diamonds in life, sure...okay fine, it just fit with the title.

This certainly is becoming more ADD and random than I had planned, but whatever.

Ahem, so when something happens that makes your day, you wanna remember it, right? I know I do. So whenever I remember, I am going to post a "Diamonds" blog to tell you what made my day. That way I can A) Brighten your day and B) Encourage you to brighten someone else's by blogging yours and C) Be able to look back on all these diamonds and smile.

I'm ready!

Xoxo.

Jordan

Whoa!

Life is going by so fast. I thought I would maybe be a mom when I realized this, but no. I've pretty much decided I want to stay a sophomore forever. My friends and I already talk about how sad graduation will be. Oh, my gosh. I am not sure I can handle it all...the change, the growing up...sigh. Okay. Well, I promised I would fill you in on recent events in my life, so here goes.

CONCERT!- Last week, Sarah's mommy took Sarah, myself, Courtney, Andrew, Ronni, and Sarah's friend Beth to the Blink 182 and Asher Roth concert. It. Was. Amazing. Haha, and I learned what pot smells like...my hoodie carried the scent for a while. Or, for a few days until my mom washed it, haha. I was slightly disappointed because the concert was supposed to be Blink, Fall Out Boy, and All-American Rejects. I knew some of their songs, haha, so it's a slight disappointment that it turned out to be Asher...it was fun, but oh gosh, he is a foul-mouthed artist. I'm pretty sure Sarah's mom's eyes were as big as saucers. Yupp, at least. Oh, and it was oh so much fun watching Andrew spazz out for Blink, apparently he's been a fan since age four? So I'm pretty sure he shed a few tears. It was great. We didn't get home until about two in the morning on Thursday, and had to be at school at eight. So, that was painful, but it was worth it. I think everyone except me was on some sort of hangover the next day, ha. To be honest, it never hit me. The exhaustion and whatnot, but it was an amazing time.

Thursday!- Yeah, so the concert was Wednesday night, we dragged through school and our Gulliver's presentations in English on Thursday, and then I went to the @nchor Community Church kid's practice...Blake and I have been doing an 8-week skit series about a brother and sister stuck on an island. It was week 8, and I was so hoping we might skip that week, but noo. Haha. Oh, dude, I totally forgot. After school, Sarah, Ronni, Leah, Andrew, Blake and I decided to go to Courtney's volleyball game. In one car. On a whim. Haha, that was fun. It ended up being at the old First Baptist of Locust Grove, which is attached to the @nchor! So Blake went home, and I just stayed and watched the game then walked over to practice. At that point, all of us were beginning to show small signs of hysteria and exhaustion...Sarah was moody and yelling at people, Courtney was totally angry, and I was peeking behind trees, haha. It was pretty awesome. I left them and went to practice and tried to explain my hysteria to Denise and Melissa pretty unsuccessfully. I am sure I entertained them, at the least.

FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBAL && SLEEPOVER!- I had all these plans to get this schoolwork done after getting a peaceful sleep Thursday night...not so much? I had to clean my room so that the woman that gave us the cat could come visit? Yeah, don't ask...but anyways, I spent most of the day cleaning and then...and THEN she decided not to come. Haha, lovely. So after that I got all my stuff packed and headed to NCCA's home football game. There, I found Wonni and Sawwah, put my dress and junk up and went to the gamee! I wonder if anyone actually watches the game? Haha, in the words of Monroe (my football playing buddy) "How was talking? Cuz I know you weren't actually watching the game?" Can't lie...haha.

After the game, Sarah, Ronni, Hailey, Megan, Courtney and me went to Anthony's pizza with Court's parents and little brother for some fooood! We then dropped Meggie off and went to sleep (or haha, not) at Cwizz's. Actually, we decided to wear black and fork our buddy Garrett's house. Good times :)) We epically fail at that though...well, the toilet paper part. That was not easy...we just did his trees because we heard a barking dog near his actual house. As for the forks, we made a picket fence of forks around his mailbox. Then we creeped away. At Cwizz, all 5 of us tried for a very long period of time to take a picture of us while lying on Cwizz's full sized bed. Haha, we got one. Courtney's mom ended up taking it, but whateverr! Hailey has it on FB.

That night was amazing. Our sleepovers always rock faces off. We role-played and listened to Sarah's made-up stories. I hid in a closet and had special time with Cwizz. We got revenge on Hailey's ex. Ronni and I practiced slow dancing for homecoming. Haha, I loveee us.

The next morning, Saturday, Cwizz left us to go to her little cousin's birthday. We all tried to figure out her oven. It took awhile, but we finally got it! Bagel Bites ended up being the only things we consumed all day. None of us realized that until about 11:00 that night. When Cwizz got back, we went and picked up Meggie and got pedicures! After, we went back to Cwizz's and got ready for four hours. I know that sounds like a lot, but I mean, it was SIX teenage girls getting ready for a dance. Sarah did hair and makeup for most of us, mainly because she is awesome at it! At about 6, our parentals started showing up to take millions of pictures outside of the Kilgore's beautiful house. As soon as our cheeks were sore, we set off in two carloads. For the first time in forever, all of us girls were actually not crammed into one vehicle! Yay!

The homecoming dance was held at a place called Pinehurst Manor in Stockbridge. It was this pretty remodeled home. I think it's a restaurant now also. The place was beautiful, but really small for a dance. The dance itself was great. So much fun, everyone let loose and went crazy. I love it when that happens! :)) Overall, it was an incredible night and an amazing weekend. After the dance, a bunch of us went to Huddle House and were honestly too tired to make a life-changing event out of it. Finally we separated and went to our separate homes.

We made so many memories. I think I wanna stay a sophomore forever.

First Quarter?!

Are you sure it's almost time for our first report cards at NCCA?
Because I'm pretty sure it has not almost been nine weeks.
Oh my gosh.
I swear, life is going by way too fast! What have I been up to? Freakishly social. I have several events coming up soon! Wanna hear? Actually, it doesn't really matter if you want to or not, lol, you are reading my blog and I'm going to tell you!
Oh, I just got into the National Honor Society at school...I don't think it's that big of a deal, because NCCA is such a small school, but the application was tedious, so I guess I'm excited?
Uh, PSAT October 14.
Blink 182 concert w/All-American Rejects and Fall Out Boy October 7. Sarah's mom is taking Sarah, Courtney, Ronni, Andrew, Bethani, and I!
Homecoming Game && Dance!
I'll let you know how everything goes :))
Love,
Jordan

Learning to Fall

I know how to catch.
When I say this, I don't mean like, a baseball, or football, or whatever. Oh, no. I mean emotionally, in relationships. I'm the catcher. The one that hides her feelings for the sake of whoever seems to need the most help. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to sound amazing, because I'm not, but I'm just trying to tell you how it is with me.
My biggest issue is that I don't know how to fall. I can't just fall in someone's arms when that's really all I need. I don't let myself be comforted, simply because I'm scared of letting people see my weaknesses.
Gahh, overall, I have learned so much about myself recently. Like that it's okay to fall. The people you've helped get back up are willing, and want to catch you. It's scary, but you gotta let go or else it will never happen. Say what you mean; mean what you say. I mean that whole heartedly. If you think no one cares, you're wrong. For me, more people than I ever thought actually cared when I finally displayed I'm not happy-go-lucky all of the time. They mean the most.

"Fall...go on and fall apart...go on and fall into these arms of mine, I'll catch you every time you fall."

Xoxo.
Jordan

Need a Hug? No.

Haha, the title of this blog makes me laugh.
I've always considered myself a considerably affectionate person.
LIE!
This week, I realized I am typically happy no matter what. But when I get down, I get really down. Sometimes for no good reason. Like this Tuesday, for instance. There was nothing really wrong with me. My life was going a-okay. I mean, I hate my Drama teacher, but that's about it. I had gotten 7 hours of sleep in comparison to my usual 5. So there was no reason that I would be pissed at the world, right?
For some reason, I was, horribly so. Since I'm usually so chill and happy, everyone was freaked out by my bad mood and pretty much it was contagious. My friends were no happy campers either. Lunch was rough, lol. But my one bright sunshine came in my day from my BFF Monroe :)
Like I said, I'm pretty affectionate. But that day, everyone kept wanting to hug me and I was not feeling it. He followed me to math and asked me what was wrong. I uneccesarily slammed my bag on the table.

"NOTHING!" I snapped.

He paused. "Do you need a hug?"

I glared. "NO!"

He tried to convince me to smile. No deal, so he left me and my anger to myself.
After math he had been playing football, and might I add, was disgustingly sweaty. Monroe saw I was still not happy and came over to me.

"You need love. Don't fight it, Jordan, this is love."

He wrapped his arms around me, and I spazzed out. "Get off! You're gross!"

Later that night, I felt really bad. He had been trying to be so sweet, (rare for him :) and I had been so mean. So I texted him. "Thanks." His response? "For what?" Smiling, I typed "For being nice to me when I didn't deserve it. He called me immediately.

"Why would you say that?"

"Why would I say what?"

"Why would you say you didn't deserve me being nice to you?

"Because I was mean to you all day and there was no reason. You were sweet and I was mean. Duh."

"Why would you ever think you wouldn't deserve me being nice to you? You're my best friend, therefore, you ALWAYS deserve it."

Moments like this are what keeps me going.

Lovesick...

Don't freak, I'm not in love.
At least, I don't think...
But that's a whole different story.
Anyhow, my blog is titled "Lovesick" because I am literally sick of love.
Not because I've experienced real, true, precious love.
Oh, no.
Because I'm sick of being the best friend to the one who always falls in love. Alwaysalwaysalways.
Never the one that falls in love. Never the one who gets fallen in love with.
Yeah, yeah. I know what you are thinking.
"You are fifteen years old. You don't know what love is."
Lie.
Okay, maybe you don't think I do. But I can guarantee you I have a grasp on the concept, at least.
I'm not necessarily complaining.
Okay, I am.
But regardless, this is why:
-I have, my whole life, been the advocate, helper, assistant, sidekick, matchmaker, etc. for pretty much all of my close friends when they have fallen for someone.
-Heck, some friends that even aren't that close.
-Guys I'm friends with always fall for my friends.
-Gahh!
-It gets frustrating that sometimes I feel it's all about how you look. I mean, sometimes I wonder if I looked a lot different, would it be different?
-If it was based on who you are, would teenage love life be a little different?

Don't get me wrong, I know my prince will come. But I'm getting tired of waiting. I know it can take many more years. I hope it doesn't, but honestly I just want to learn that true love exists, and it can happen to me. Does that make sense? I'm sorry you had to deal with me being frustrated, but I don't get like this often. When I do, it's not pretty. Thanks for letting me vent.
-Jordan

Summer...condensed, in a more condensed way.

Does that even make sense?
Oh, well.
Haha. So where did my last summer blog leave off? Camp, Amber, hmm...pretty much, I was rarely home. I had the best time ever with all of my amazing friends. They make me who I am :) We went to Grandaddy's beach house in St. Mary's, GA for four days. I brought my friend Gabrielle, and Blake brought his friend Steven. It was a blast! What else? Um, I spent a WHOLE lotta time with my freshman girls, Sarah, Courtney, and Ronni. Overall, that's pretty much it. I think. I'll fill you in more if I think of anything else? But I feel like I had to finish up SOMETHING about my two months out of school, or else there would be a hole in my heart forever, and thaaat would suck. Okay, so I'm being a little over dramatic. But from me, what else do you expect?
Jordan

Jordan's Condensed Summer...

Shoot me. I'm sorry. Someone should sue me for horrid blogging ability. Buuut, what's done is done. So I will fill you in on my summer speedily and elaborate on a few high points! Here we go.

**CAMP! So, with my bff Cwizzle, I decided to go to youth camp at Orange Beach. It was pretty amazing. Not full-blown amazing, like I have experienced and was expecting, but it wasn't bad. I made a lot of amazing memories with Court, Megan, Mikaila, and Cristen. Good times when girls go crazy and rock out in the middle of the night, huh? I'm not sure that this description is adequate. I'll do a more in depth one below.

So, in my past, I have been to 3 INCREDIBLY AMAZING FANTASTIC WONDERFUL LIFE-CHANGING camp-like summer experiences that I will NEVER EVER forget. Because of them I am not the same person I would have been otherwise. I came to realize that every year, I expected more and more and received. I'm thinking my expectations were too high to reach maybe. But the thing is, I'm not sure if anyone from the particular youth group I went with to Student Life 2009 at Orange Beach reads my blog, so I'll just say that it's not as much fun being part of people who have never experienced full-blown Jesus and don't understand. Like, I'm sure they grew a lot as Christians, but I just got a little spark of the fresh Jesus fire I was looking for. But whatever, I'm glad I went.

**Amber! So, when I was at camp, my mom called me to tell me that my friend Amber (more on that in a sec) had CALLED me. I was amazed. So, I'm not going to tell you how I did it, but I called her back. (Let's just say I had to do a lot of sweet-talking and eyelash-batting) She didn't answer. So I went on with my camp life, and got back on a Tuesday. When I got home, she had left me a VOICEMAIL! She wanted to hang out. I'll now explain why this was sooo crazy.

See, Amber and I have been best friends pretty much since 7th grade, when we met at McDonough Christian Academy. I knew that separating and going to different high schools was going to be hard on our friendship, but I was pretty sure that we could still make it work. And, it was working. We saw each other roughly once a month and talked about once a week. Until February. In February she met her boyfriend, Zakk. The last time I had hung out with her was the day after she and Zakk's very first date. So, to all of you out there who have been teenagers, let me just say, it's really hard to have your BFF pick a boy over you. You all probably already knew that, but let's just say it KILLED me. I tried to talk to her often, but she was always too busy. She told me that she and Zakk were together so much, that it would be hard for us to get a chance to be together. I knew that if I tried to tell her she was doing something wrong by leaving me behind, she would pull away from me even more. I have never experienced that kind of emotion before. Finally, in early June I decided to stop trying to contact her. What was even the point? All of my other friends knew how much her decision had hurt me. They told me she wasn't worth it, but I knew she was. So I decided to just let her come to me, knowing with a heavy heart that that might never happen.

Like I previously said, that camp wasn't life-changing. But at it I did decide to let Amber go and move on with my life. Coincidentally, she had decided to contact me right when I made that decision.

So when I got home, I called her back. She was like "Hey! Do you mind if I come over tonight?" Pretty much I was awestruck, dumbfounded, and on my second wind (I had just gotten back a few hours ago from camp and had five days and about 20 hours total of sleep. Give or take. Mostly take.) I asked my mom, and that night Beverly dropped Amber off. Now, I'm not gonna lie. I'm a pretty decent actress. I love theater, and being in it. So I was shocked when I couldn't even pretend that I was okay with Amber. I didn't know what she was doing at my house, and couldn't hide it. I wasn't talking, looking her in the eye, and I was pretty sure if I said too much, I would start crying. I'm not emotional, AT ALL, but this whole situation was weirding me out. Amber asked if we could go swimming. A huge part of me and Amber' s friendship has been by the pool, on the deck, specifically. We have had so many talks about life and laughed so hard we cried there. I agreed, and we got in our bathing suits and headed outside. (It was late, about 10:00 PM then, as it always had been when we would go out for our late-night talks) We got in the water. Amber acted as if everything was the same as it used to be. I got on a float, and she got in the inner tube. Then she came over and rested her chin on my arm. I was kinda freaked that she was being so touchy. It was the old Amber, not the new and boyfriend-loving Amber. She talked about school and stuff, and I gave mindless answers.

Finally she said "Wanna go on the deck?" I said "Umm, sure." We got out of the water and dried off, and the laid out on the deck chairs. She was talking about how she had changed this year. I was doing more of the whole,"Uh-huh. Yeah." thing when she looked at me with tears in her eyes. "What?" I asked, confused. She said "I realize what I have been doing to you and I'm sorry. You're worth more than that. Zakk will never be as important as you are. I don't know how you've put up with me so long, treating you like you're worthless. I've been pushing you aside and it's not fair. I came over because I don't want to lose you and was afraid I already had." I am pretty sure I skipped a heartbeat or two at that point. I didn't even know what to say. Me, not having an answer? Yeah, that's just not like me. I finally just put my head in my hands. She was crying hard at that point. I guess she didn't know if I was about to tell her off or what. She said "What? What?" and I finally looked up and told her "I didn't think you knew. You don't know how much you have put me through. All of my friends know how much this hurt me, and they said I should just forget you. But I knew I couldn't. I can't believe you realized it. I can't believe it." We kinda sat there in silence for a minute, me in disbelief. Amber said that she realized what she had done a few days before when she was talking to her mom about what a good friend I was and she hadn't talked to me in awhile. When her mom asked her why that was, Amber realized because she had been treating me like crap. As soon as it hit her, she freaked out. She told me she cried herself to sleep that night. I was amazed that she cared. Beyond words amazed.

Then Amber said (and sorry for the language here, but it's kind of necessary.) "I'm sorry I was such a bitch."

I replied," You weren't a bitch."

We both sat there for a second.

Amber retaliated after considering that. "Yeah, I was."

I paused for a second. "Mm, yeah, you were."

Then we laughed. It felt so good to laugh with her. We had a great time together that night, it was like nothing had ever changed. I was just so happy and satisfied with my life because that was the major thing bringing me down all of the time. I loved that we were close again.

Holy crap, that was a freaking long post. Well, I don't think that was a very condensed version of my summer, more like the first week or so. More later, when I don't have SO much to say. Moral of the story? Never give up on true friendship. If it's true, it won't fail you.

Xoxo.

Jordan Elizabeth =]

Summer 2009- Week 1

I officially decided that I want to be a journalist someday. Like, fo rizzle. Writing is what I love. So the question remains, why can't I keep up with a blog?

Well, now I have a responsibility. I have to write about every week. Because if every week is as busy as this past one, (and I hope that's true) then there will be a lot to tell. Let's take this from the last day of school, shall we?

Thursday (Last day of NCC!)- Exams, eww. That's all I can really say about those things. Plus that just because you finish your English exam before me (Monroe) doesn't mean you got a better grade (what then!). After having a "group therapy session" with some amazing folks, it was time to go. I took Sarah with me and we left our freshman year behind us when we walked out the doors. (That sounded way more dramatic than what we did, but whatever, that's what happened!)

We went with Mom to hunt for some way to make her superlative certificates for her preschoolers look much cooler. Sarah used her mad artists skills, breathed deeply near the paper section of Micheal's, and made some amazing sparkly certificates. Plus, I got gold stars! If you know me, then you know that that's a good thing, for me at least. After that, we went to eat Mexican with Dad. ("Yes, Sarah, we don't believe in beverages. We are on a strictly solid diet.") Spontanaeity struck, and we speed-demoned it to Jake's play at Griffin Christian. It had a great moral behind it, and I was impressed with my little Jaketh's acting ability. Kinda :)

After we came home, Sarah and I chilled and watched an amazing movie called "Seven Pounds" with Will Smith. It was fantastic; I loved it and the depth that it contained. This movie was to be watched by me three times in the next week because of it's amazingness! Deep conversations and inside jokes, and then sleep finally came!

Friday- We were up early to go visit the preschoolers of Jodeco Academy, my mom's school. They had an awesome program, and Sarah and I had a great time playing with them. I love that age group. The program and fun concluded, so Sarah, Dad, and I went to Sam's to get stuff for my party that night!

Well, it wasn't really a party. There was just Sarah, myself, Ronni, and Courtney. (Well, I don't know if you count Mr. Spock...that fact remains to be seen!) Our menu included: Honey BBQ wings, chips, and double doozies. Nice? Oh yes. Healthy? Not so much. When those two girls got there, they just added to the fun. We swam in 68 degree water and loved every second of being together. Sleep happened, but rather late!

Saturday- Ronni got picked up, then Sarah left me, and Courtney and I begged to go shopping. How could my mom resist? There was no way. She loves shopping. So, we headed to the movies first. Blake and Dad saw Terminator 3 while Mom, Court, and I saw Obsessed. Ahh! It was freaky and really good. Then we went shopping! New bathing suit for camp. Oh yeah!


***Update. Three months later. Yeah, I suck.***
So, I'm going to post this now, on August 21, and because I'm still a bad blogger, this is the only summer blogging I did. I promise I'll do better this school year! Lol. Please forgive? Love! XOXO.

"All The World's a Stage..."

"and all of the men are simply players."
Meet my cast.

Brittany Ryann Foster- Best friend, sister, etc. We've been friends for eight years. There is no one that could ever take this girl's place. I feel more comfortable around you than anyone else in the whole wide world. We have sooo many inside jokes, it's crazy. No matter what we are doing, we have a great time. We have been through so much together. You are a huge part of who I am, and I love you with all of my heart, Chet.


Heather Faye Hartley- I'm glad that, through our awkward stages, we met. You are the most loyal friend I think I've ever had. I trust you so very much. I know that you will always be there, no matter what happens. Our insiders are so amazing that no one would ever understand them! We have been through hell and back with boys, parents, drama, and life in general but our friendship always stands. That will never change. We will never lose each other. I love you, banana nut muffin :)

Amber June Byrd- No one defines BFF better than you. It's amazing how close we have grown in just three years. You mean the world to me. You know I will always be there for you. I hate how we don't see each other as much as we should, but anytime I need you, you are always there. I have laughed with you so hard I couldn't breathe, and we've been each other's shoulders. I know God put you in my life for a reason, and I love you so so so much, Amber Byrd.

Krista Kay Rhineheimer- From the time we met, in 2nd grade, I knew we would always be friends. We had so much in common, it was crazy. It's amazing to me how we can have grown up and changed so much but I still can call you one of my best friends. Life is crazy now, but you always have a special place in my heart and I love you very much.

Megan Elizabeth Sears- Kindergarten. Kindergarten! No one can top that. What friends go from coloring and napping to shopping and driving ten years later?!?! Us. I love that. The fact that we live far away is a pain, but whenever we're together, we still have a connection. I'm not sure how that happens, but it does and I love everything about you. You are so special to me. I know that you will always be in my life. I love you, Mess :)

Sarah Elizabeth Rowan- Sometimes there are just people you meet that you know will always matter. You are one of them. I've only known you since the beginning of ninth grade, but you are one of my favorite people in the whole wide world. You understand me and my sense of humor, and I understand yours. I can be myself around you, and don't have to hold back anything. Our friendship's existence simply makes me happy, and I luv you with all of my organs :)

Courtney Taylor Kilgore- Girl, you're my favorite small, spastic child. Haha. We have so much fun together, and we have made so many memories this freshman year. I honestly can't wait for the next three years of high school, as long as I'll be with you. You are a great friend, and I know I'm lucky to have you. I will always be here for you. Don't forget that. I love you, Spidermonkey!

Thomas Monroe Bell- You made it onto my cast list! Don't you feel important? Haha. First of all, you are one of my closest friends. I don't know if I've ever met anyone that I have so much in common with. From our sense of humor, goals, and even quirks, there is an almost scary amount of similarities. (Even though your bad-apple sense of humor is a little more inappropriate than mine...) I trust you with a LOT more than I'm willing to tell other people, and I can honestly say I can see why God put you in my life. I <3 you!

TRUCKKKK!!!

I have been going to youth group since I started the 6th grade. I am now almost done with 9th grade. So, I've attended youth for three years. Sure, that's a long time, but it seems I still have awhile to go. But no matter how many different youth groups I go to, it's getting old. I hear the same messages over and over again. It was exciting hearing them for the first time, but I want something new. Regardless, sometimes something I hear just hits me and really makes an impact. Last night, I visited ELCA youth and I wanted to let you know what I heard.

We're all going to die. It's just a fact. So why are we here? We have to win people for God. People are dying, every day, and going to hell because they don't know. Who am I, to have all of this knowledge, and keep it to myself.

It's hard to bring up God and his infinite, powerful love into a conversation with your friends. I understand that. You have to know where the line is of being an annoying, judgmental Christian and the different one. The one that actually wins people to God because they live out what they say and don't try to shove Christianity onto anyone.

Is that it? Is what I wrote what hit me last night? No, I've known that stuff. I hope you have, too. And if you haven't, I hope you understand it and are affected by it. But what I heard is something that I think you need to hear too.

So, you're saved. You're going to heaven. What about your friends? What about the ones you love? THEY ARE GOING TO HELL IF YOU DON'T DO SOMETHING. This is what they said: "If you saw an 18-wheeler coming straight toward someone on the street, would you say something?" That's just like hell. It's coming. What kind of person wouldn't warn someone about that? So next time you're talking to someone you know is not saved and you want to talk about God and how he saved you, but can't think "TRUCKKKK!!!". Think about the truck that is coming straight towards them, and how you would want someone to tell you if a truck was about to flatten you.

That's all for now.
<3
Jordan

Freshman Realizations

I truly cannot believe that my freshman year is in it's fourth and final quarter. Where has this year gone? I was so excited to get into high school and get through it, but now I just want it to slow down a little! Boy, have I evolved this year. Here are some things I've come to realize as a freshman-
-True friends stick around and put you before boys.
-If they don't, it's not worth it.
-Things (and when I say this, I mean people) are not always as amazing as they seem.
-Romantic feelings change everything in a friendship.
-You have to believe someone's life by what they do, not what they say.
-Everyone will fail you, except God.
-When you get away from God, he's still right there where you left him, waiting for you.
-God doesn't move away from you, you move away from him.
-If you care what other people think to much, you're wasting your life away by pleasing other people.
-Take every opportunity you get. You never know if you will get it again.
-Sometimes, it makes you stronger to let go.
-But it makes you even stronger to move on.
-Living in the past takes too much time out of your future.
-You cannot plan out your life, I think God laughs at that.
-Standing up for what you believe in isn't always easy, but it's worth it.

Some of these things I knew, but had never experienced. Some of them I knew, but didn't believe, while others are new entirely. I think in middle school, you are looking for who you are, but in high school, the goal is to keep that person you found. It's not easy, but is anything worthwhile really easy? Something I've learned about God is that he doesn't force himself on you. He comes when you ask. This year I've struggled spiritually, because it wasn't as easy for me to be a leader. People didn't look up to me like they did last year. But I think because of that, I've learned the most. Each and every day I'm changing, and I can finally say, I like who I'm becoming.

What if this is you? What if you don't agree with some of those things on my list? Well, you don't have to, certainly. I know high school is not the real world, but it is preparation for it. If you don't know who exactly it is you are, it's time to figure it out. How do you do that? Listen to your heart, and your head. It's a difficult balance. But most of all, come to God with everything. He really is the only best friend that will never, EVER fail you. We all need someone like that. You can find your identity in him. There is a song that really and truly touches my heart. There are two, actually. I am going to post the lyrics so you can read them, and remember to give it all to God, the king above all kings.

"Lead Me to the Cross"
Hillsong United

Savior I come
Quiet my soul remember
Redemptions hill
Where Your blood was spilled
For my ransom
Everything I once held dear
I count it all as lost

Lead me to the cross
Where Your love poured out
Bring me to my knees
Lord I lay me down
Rid me of myself
I belong to You
Lead me, lead me to the cross

You were as I
Tempted and trialed
You are
Te word became flesh
Bore my sin and death
Now you're risen

To your heart
To your heart
Lead me to your heart
Lead me to your heart

When you think you've lost yourself, look to God, and allow him to lead you to the cross. Here's the next song. It's by Chris Tomlin, and it gives me chill bumps every time.

"Jesus Messiah"

Chris Tomlin

He became sin
Who knew no sin
That we might become His Righteousness
He humbled himself and carried the cross

Love so amazing
Love so amazing

Chorus:
Jesus Messiah
Name above all names
Blessed Redeemer
Emmanuel
The rescue for sinners
The ransom from Heaven
Jesus Messiah
Lord of all

His body the bread
His blood the wine
Broken and poured out all for love
The whole earth trembled
And the veil was torn

Chorus:

All our hope is in You
All our hope is in You
All the glory to You, God
The light of the world


Remember, all our hope is in Him. The light of the world.
<3
Jordan